SPCS

SOCIETY FOR PROMOTION OF COMMUNITY STANDARDS INC.

What marriage means to New Zealand couples – Stuff News

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“New Zealand has become something of a marital wasteland…. Last year, for every 1000 single people of a marriageable age, 22 got married. That’s less than a quarter of the 1971 peak rate of 91 per 1000.”

Source: http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/love-sex/10173666/The-aisle-less-travelled

The Society for Promotion of Community Standards Inc. has as one of its objects “To promote wholesome personal values, consistent with the moral teachings of the Bible, including strong family life and the benefits of lasting marriage as the foundation for stable communities.” (S. 2[c] of Society’s Constitution).

The Society finds the responses of those interviewed by Stuff News on the meaning and importance of marriage, very encouraging (in particular the case quoted below).

Stuff News spoke with couples about what marriage means to them:

Names: Amy and Brett [surnames deleted]; business owners, Christchurch. Marital status: Engaged

How long have you known each other, and how long have you been a couple?  We met when I was nine and Brett was 10, we were in standard four and both in the same class. Brett used to buy me 50c mixtures. We got together 12 months ago when I was 28 and Brett 29. Brett proposed last month.

Why is marriage important to you?

Amy: For me it’s a commitment, a decision to share everything I am, my faith, ups and downs, to care and love someone who has declared to do the same for me. We want to celebrate the start of our lives together in ceremony that includes our families and friends supporting us on our journey.  Brett: It’s a declaration and commitment before God that you are going to love and support that person, care and grow with them for life.

What is the role of marriage in society, why do people still get married?

Amy: Its the foundation of society, a team of two who recognise that with each other they can support and encourage each other in every area of life, raise a strong healthy family as a unit with similar core values and beliefs. People get married for various reasons; romantic, religious and convenience. Mostly though because at some level couples still see the value or specialness of a public ceremony. It still holds a romantic buzz that declares that this relationship is special, we are in love and we want to make a statement to the world! Brett: To create a family together which has a stable foundation and the skills to have a positive impact on our future. A family with a social and moral conscience. People still get married because it’s a very special moment in someone’s life when they feel ridiculously comfortable, happy and couldn’t imagine their life without them, aka love.

Why do you think the number of marriages is in decline?

Amy: High divorce rates possibly takes the sparkle or allure out of marriage, especially for children who have experienced it. Pursuing careers and getting financially ahead is a pretty strong focus these days before considering marriage.  Brett: I guess some people have seen marriages implode and question its relevance or value in their own lives. It is a shame that marriage doesn’t have a better track record.

Have your views on marriage changed over time? How?

Amy: No I’m a traditional girl and have always dreamed of my wedding day and waiting for the right guy at the right time.  Brett: Apart from the fact I thought I was going to get married at 23 (when I was young this seemed like the right time) and I’m now 30 it’s pretty much the same.  Amy: I actually thought I would marry at 23 too, I think that was what both our parents did. So maybe our views on marriage did change along the way!

Source: http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/love-sex/10173666/The-aisle-less-travelled

Act Leader Jamie Whyte stands by incest comments – NZ Herald

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New Act Leader Jamie Whyte is standing by his comments that incestuous relationships between consenting adults should not be illegal and says it would be “intellectually corrupt” of him not to be honest when asked such questions.

In an article published on The Ruminatorwebsite, [see http://ruminator.co.nz/mr-ryght/] former philosophy lecturer Dr Whyte was asked whether the state should intervene if adult siblings wanted to marry each other.

“Well personally, I don’t think they [the State] should”, he replied, adding it was “a matter of almost no significance because it just doesn’t happen”.

Dr Whyte told the Herald his response was based on his belief that: “I don’t think the state should intervene in consensual adult sex or marriage, but there are two very important elements here – consensual and adult”.

“I wonder who does believe the state should intervene in consensual adult acts?”

He said he was “very opposed” to incest.

“I find it very distasteful I don’t know why anybody would do it but it’s a question of principle about whether or not people ought to interfere with actions that do no harm to third parties just because they personally wouldn’t do it.”

He did not believe the increased risk of congenital disorders in children from incestuous relationships was a valid reason for it to illegal.

” The probability of having some problem with the children is greater when the mother is over the age of 35 but I’ve never heard anyone suggest that anyone over the age of 35 shouldn’t be allowed to have sex.”

His view was not Act policy and “nobody who votes for Act has anything to fear”.

Dr Whyte who was elected Act Leader earlier this month but officially takes over from John Banks this weekend said he was not prepared to avoid difficult questions like that about incest as other politicians might.

“Maybe I should, but it seems to me the people who find ways around it and avoid it are being less virtuous than me… I would have to be inconsistent, I would have to be intellectually corrupt.”

Source

Full story see:

Act Leader Jamie Whyte stands by incest comments. Article by Adam Bennett. Published 27/02/14

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=11210373

Note:

According to The Ruminator (26/02/14), Jamie holds a PhD in Philosophy from Cambridge and his résumé includes Management Consulting and writing for The Times and Wall Street Journal.

This Momentary Marriage: A Parable of Permanence – by theologian John Piper

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This Momentary Marriage: A Parable of Permanence by John Piper. The chasm between the biblical vision of marriage and the common human conception is—and has always been—gargantuan. Reflecting on over forty years of matrimony, John Piper exalts the biblical meaning of marriage over its emotion, exhorting couples to keep their covenant as a display of Christ’s covenant-keeping love for the church. He aims to lift the church’s low view of marriage to something infinitely greater, namely, a vision of Jesus’s unswerving allegiance to and affection for his bride. This Momentary Marriage unpacks the biblical vision, its unexpected contours, and its weighty implications for married, single, divorced, and remarried alike. Now available in paperback with a freshly redesigned cover, Piper’s book on marriage holds even greater appeal.

Hardcover 2009; Paperback 2012
Crossway Books (Wheaton, Illinois)

See: http://www.desiringgod.org/resource-library/books/this-momentary-marriage

http://cdn.desiringgod.org/pdf/books_bmm/bmm.pdf

Excerpt

“The aim of this book is to enlarge your vision of what marriage is. As Bonhoeffer says, it is more than your love for each other. Vastly more. Its meaning is infinitely great. I say that with care. The meaning of marriage is the display of the covenant-keeping love between Christ and his people” (p. 15).

Table of Contents

Foreword: Pendulums and Pictures by Noël Piper
Introduction: Marriage and Martyrdom

1. Staying Married Is Not Mainly about Staying in Love
2. Naked and Not Ashamed
3. God’s Showcase of Covenant-Keeping Grace
4. Forgiving and Forbearing
5. Pursuing Conformity to Christ in the Covenant
6. Lionhearted and Lamblike—The Christian Husband as Head: Foundations of Headship
7. Lionhearted and Lamblike—The Christian Husband as Head: What Does It Mean to Lead?
8. The Beautiful Faith of Fearless Submission
9. Single in Christ: A Name Better Than Sons and Daughters
10. Singleness, Marriage, and the Christian Virtue of Hospitality
11. Faith and Sex in Marriage
12. Marriage Is Meant for Making Children . . . Disciples of Jesus: How Absolute Is the Duty to Procreate?
13. Marriage Is Meant for Making Children . . . Disciples of Jesus: The Conquest of Anger in Father and Child
14. What God Has Joined Together, Let Not Man Separate: The Gospel and the Radical New Obedience
15. What God Has Joined Together, Let Not Man Separate: The Gospel and the Divorced

An incredible wedding!

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A Pennsylvania couple who had been dating for less than a year when one of them suffered a traumatic brain injury have married, and made a touching video documenting their journey. They have found great strength and inspiration in the book by theologian John Piper: This Momentary Marriage.

See more: http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/weddings/9342913/An-incredible-wedding

Story by Aimee Guliver. Fairfax NZ News. 30/10/13

http://www.desiringgod.org/resource-library/books/this-momentary-marriage

 

This Momentary Marriage by John Piper

A Parable of Permanence

The chasm between the biblical vision of marriage and the common human conception is—and has always been—gargantuan. Reflecting on over forty years of matrimony, John Piper exalts the biblical meaning of marriage over its emotion, exhorting couples to keep their covenant as a display of Christ’s covenant-keeping love for the church. He aims to lift the church’s low view of marriage to something infinitely greater, namely, a vision of Jesus’s unswerving allegiance to and affection for his bride. This Momentary Marriageunpacks the biblical vision, its unexpected contours, and its weighty implications for married, single, divorced, and remarried alike. Now available in paperback with a freshly redesigned cover, Piper’s book on marriage holds even greater appeal.

Hardcover 2009; Paperback 2012
Crossway Books (Wheaton, Illinois)

Table of Contents

Foreword: Pendulums and Pictures by Noël Piper
Introduction: Marriage and Martyrdom

1. Staying Married Is Not Mainly about Staying in Love
2. Naked and Not Ashamed
3. God’s Showcase of Covenant-Keeping Grace
4. Forgiving and Forbearing
5. Pursuing Conformity to Christ in the Covenant
6. Lionhearted and Lamblike—The Christian Husband as Head: Foundations of Headship
7. Lionhearted and Lamblike—The Christian Husband as Head: What Does It Mean to Lead?
8. The Beautiful Faith of Fearless Submission
9. Single in Christ: A Name Better Than Sons and Daughters
10. Singleness, Marriage, and the Christian Virtue of Hospitality
11. Faith and Sex in Marriage
12. Marriage Is Meant for Making Children . . . Disciples of Jesus: How Absolute Is the Duty to Procreate?
13. Marriage Is Meant for Making Children . . . Disciples of Jesus: The Conquest of Anger in Father and Child
14. What God Has Joined Together, Let Not Man Separate: The Gospel and the Radical New Obedience
15. What God Has Joined Together, Let Not Man Separate: The Gospel and the Divorced

 

Are same sex marriages performed before 22 August 2013 unlawful and void?

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There is a widespread belief that same-sex couples will be lawfully able to marry from today Monday 19 August. The Marriage (Definition of Marriage) Amendment Act 2013 comes into effect on 19 August 2013. However the Marriage Act 1955 provides that to be married a couple must first give notice to the registrar of an intention to marry, and be issued with a marriage license.  The license is to be issued by the registrar not earlier than the third day after the notice is given. A same-sex couple therefore cannot legally apply for a marriage license before 19 August – as they would not lawfully be able to marry before then. A notice of intention must certify that the applicants are lawfully able to marry – specifically that “that there is no lawful impediment to the intended marriage”. Until 19 August that would not be the case for a same-sex couple, as the new law was not yet in effect. So any notices submitted before the 19th would be invalid.

The Marriage Forms Regulations 1995 containing the Notice of Intention to Marry forms were amended by the Marriage (Forms) Amendment Regulations 2013 – the latter coming into force from 16 August 2013.  However these merely described the new forms required, and did not legalise same-sex marriage. If the earliest date that a legal notice can be given of an intended marriage is 19 August, the earliest that a registrar could issue a valid license would be 22 August. In practice the earliest that a legal same-sex marriage could occur would also be 22 August 2013. Any earlier marriages would be unlawful, and void.

A Media Release issued on 12 August 2013 by the Registrar-General of Births Deaths and Marriages, Jeff Montgomery (the Department of Internal Affairs) stated

Couples will use the forms for marriages occurring from 19 August, the first day same sex couples can get married …

“The new notification of marriage form includes the terms ‘bride’, ‘bridegroom’ and ‘partner’. Couples need to fill out the form and then one of the couple needs to bring the form to a Registry Office, make a statutory declaration in front of a Registrar of Marriages and pay the fee. Three days later we will issue the couple a marriage licence.”

Comment: Those same-sex couples who signed (only one member is required to do so ) and submitted a Notice of Intended Marriage on Friday 16 August 2013 – indicating by way of “solemn declaration” that they knew of “no legal impediment to the intended marriage” made false declarations in breach of the Oaths and Declaration Act 1957. Under the Marriage Act 1955 which remained in force until midnight Sunday 18 August 2013, they would not have been entitled to get married at the time they signed the statutory declaration so the Notice of Intended Marriage is INVALID. The earliest it could have been lawfully signed was on 19 August 2013 when the Marriage (Redefinition of Marriage) Act 2013 came into force.

See: Statutory Declaration Point 4. [to be completed in front of the Registrar]

http://legislation.govt.nz/regulation/public/2013/0294/17.0/DLM5349711.html

4. that there is no lawful impediment to the intended marriage

And I make this solemn declaration conscientiously believing the same to be true and by virtue of the Oaths and Declarations Act 1957